|
 This
is one of the most interesting NDEs you will ever read. After evaluating
Guenter Wagner's childhood NDE profiled here, I have found some very
interesting aspects about it. His discussion of the "black world" is a
very good description of the
void
experience which many experiencers have described.
In the void, or what the Bible refers to as "outer
darkness," there exists all kinds of mischievous souls. These souls
often refuse to enter the light for some reason. They are souls with
heavy negative vibrations and are often thought to be "demons". But
souls of higher vibrations (i.e. light beings) try to bring these
unfortunate souls into the light which they ultimately succeed in doing.
Many near-death accounts
involve this void and it is generally only a transitory space that
people travel through (usually by means of the tunnel) to get to
the light. Some people spend more time in the void than others, but the
evidence suggests that souls remain there until they find within
themselves the love that causes them to be attracted to the light and
leave the void.
Guenter's NDE is like many
others in that he experiences the Being of Light (whom he identifies
as Jesus), the void, and a very interesting life review. He also
experiences time travel, but Guenter's time travel experience is
like none I have ever read. Although his NDE may seem unusual at times
(because the void experience can be unusual), this is a good example
of the subjective nature of NDEs. It is also a long near-death account
but certainly well worth reading.
I do not know
exactly how old I was when I had this experience, but everything
happened in our new home, so I must have been 11 years old, at least.
On that day I left my flat on the first floor when, all of a sudden, I
heard a voice behind me. I quickly turned around but there was nobody. I
cannot recall the exact words, but the voice said, in effect, that the
quality of my world that I knew of was nothing compared to the one that
he would be able to show me. “Nonsense,” I said to myself and started to
run down the stairs to the basement in a boisterous and cheerful way.
There were only a few steps left when I jumped up high knocking my head
against the ceiling.
The impact of this blow sent me down on my knees and I quickly passed out.
I fell into a deep blackness. I remember going through a kind of black
hose. At the end of it, I felt being drawn back by a mysterious
force, but I resisted because I did not want to go back through that
black hose again. I went forward and suddenly I found myself in a gray
space.
I did not know where I was, and, looking around, I saw in some distance
someone slowly coming towards me. Actually, I did not see this figure at
all because there was nothing to look at. However, I sensed a gray
figure being there. I definitely knew that there was someone. I said:
“I have lost
my way. Could you please show me the right way back?”
The next thing I knew was that I was lying on the basement floor. I heard
this extremely uncomfortable ringing noise, which gradually became more
and more intense. Then the noise stopped, and, all of a sudden, I
realized that a white, gauze-like material was very slowly oozing out of
my head.
It took on the shape of a very long stocking and floated at a slight angle
right above me. I became very embarrassed, because I did not want to be
seen by anyone with this material coming out of me. Meanwhile, more of
this gauze-like material was collecting itself under the ceiling and I
could not do anything to stop it. I did not feel any pain whatsoever in
this process.
Suddenly it dawned on me that I was out of my body. It must have happened
the moment this oozing stopped. I saw a body lying on the floor, which
could only belong to me. I was shivering and I quickly wanted to return
to my body and its warmth when I heard someone say:
”Stop! Before
going back, see what it is like outside!”
[Webmaster
note: I believe this is the voice of a mischievous soul in the void]
However, I
did not pay any attention to the voice. Although I could not see any
physical body but my own, this voice was quite near. Then I heard it
again, this time it was begging me very earnestly.
”Please, do
not go back, I beseech you. Why do you not want to discover your
new faculties first? You may still go back if you do not like them.”
I hesitated. After all, this voice was right. Why shouldn't I give it a
try? On that the voice said quickly:
”Test
your mind! If you do you will discover that you can think in a way you
have never experienced before.”
The voice was right again. I could think very lucidly indeed, and I was
able to understand very quickly with a directness that did not leave a
trace of doubt. Then I heard the voice again:
”If you are
willing to stay outside of your body, you will make a wonderful
journey and you will see many interesting things. However, you must
decide quickly! So hurry up!”
Eventually I began to consider the whole situation. It was really up to me
whether I wanted to return to my body and live the life on Earth with
all its limitations and with all its joy or to stay outside in this
condition of clear thinking. The voice again urged me to hurry up and to
tell him whether I had made up my mind.
I gave in. I decided to stay outside and I instantly realized that my body
had to die, meaning total destruction by decay. I thought to myself:
”How sad for
my mother!”
As for me, I did not feel any regrets, because my body was now only a
wrapper to me, a burden of which I freed myself the moment I had decided
to stay outside.
Presently I realized that I was able to move freely about in a way I had
never experienced before. I was floating right through the walls of our
house
(I saw my mother in front of the kitchen stove cooking a meal)
and up into the sky. In the distance, I saw a great shining ball, which
was the sun. I felt irresistibly attracted to it by its brightness and I
wanted to go right into it. No sooner had I thought this when I hit
something that catapulted me far out into blackness. I tried once more,
but it all happened again. I quickly learned that there had to be an
invisible barrier that I could only approach but not overcome.
I had another go and this time I stopped right in front of this barrier in
order to watch the sun, which was now shining in a reddish glow. Its
size was relatively small because I had to look at it from a distance,
which was determined by this invisible barrier. Nevertheless, the
reddish glow of the sun did not satisfy me at all. Suddenly the voice
said:
"There are
more lights!”
As I was looking around, I saw in the distance a multitude of other
lights, which shone much brighter than the Earth's sun. I wanted to be
with those lights! Although they were far, far away, I could reach them
in an instant. However, each individual light had its own effective
barrier that knocked me off into the blackness again every time I tried
to approach it.
Getting in contact with these barriers was very unpleasant, because every
time I touched them, my whole being was violently shaken. All of a
sudden, the voice said:
”Look for a
single, bright light and approach it slowly.”
[Webmaster
note: I believe this is either the voice of a helpful light being or
a helpful soul in the void.]
I chose an individual light whose brightness was much greater than all the
other lights around it and I approached it very carefully. I saw a huge
ball burning incredibly bright. The voice told me that it was one of the
many stars that I was able to see from the Earth.
I was watching this ball for quite a long time until I could not look at
it any longer. Therefore, I withdrew into the blackness again. I began
to consider my situation. I could not stay in that blackness forever.
There must be a way out. I looked around and I saw another cluster of
stars that was strangely twisted. I wanted to go there but I heard the
voice say:
”They are all
alike. Go up!”
I did not
know where up was, but tried all the same - with success, because I saw
very far away, over the blackness, a shimmering line. I wanted to go
there in spite of that incredibly long distance, but I only wanted to go
to the edge of this line, because I did not know whether it had
a barrier or not.
I covered the distance instantly. This time there was no barrier that
would repel me. The light came from another world. (While our world
is black with lights in it - this other world is bright).
However, I could not enter this world. I was moving around in every
direction trying to figure out a passageway to this world. I soon
realized that there was only one possibility: Hurling myself down this
black abyss that lay right in front of me. I hesitated. I did not have
the courage to jump. But, suddenly, I heard the voice again:
”There is no
other way! You will have to jump! Jump! Jump!”
Then I
jumped. I do not know what happened next, but I do remember very vividly
that I suddenly found myself moving at a tremendous speed through a
tunnel of blackness. I had entered this tunnel headfirst. My whole being
was in a kind of a cylinder or pipe and I shot through this tunnel like
a capsule in the tubes of a pneumatic post.
I was moving faster and faster, until I was ejected far into this new
universe. The blackness was instantly substituted by a sort of dim
brightness (if I may say so).
I tumbled over myself several times very vehemently until I felt being
slowed down by this new world. I remember thinking:
"Why are they
treating me so rough?”
I felt this
new world closing in on while simultaneously the old world was
retreating until I was completely taken up by this new world. While
being ejected I heard the voice shout at me:
”This is your
world! You do not belong to us! You have to remain in this world! Don't
you ever try to come back.”
I turned around and I saw a piece of the black world, which I must have
trailed behind me while being ejected, withdraw to the opening where it
was finally sucked up.
The moment the old world was shut out, I was immediately taken up by the
new one, so much so, that I was thoroughly convinced that I could only
further exist in this new world. I had no choice anyway. The black
world was gone. I was now an inseparable part of this new world. I
thought to myself:
”This
scoundrel of a voice! He has betrayed me by forcing me into this world.
There is no way back! This is final! Hopefully, I will be able to
breathe and not suffocate to death.”
Therefore, I tried to breathe, but I soon found out that no breathing was
necessary. I simply could exist. As long as I was in the black world, I
had never thought about breathing.
As I said earlier, everything around me was dimly bright. Although it was
bright, I could not see clearly. The impact of the finality of the
condition I was in was overwhelming. Although I felt being part of this
new world I did not know anything about it. I felt utterly alone,
betrayed, very tiny and insignificant. No other soul far and wide. I
started wailing about my situation. I did not know what to do. I
felt very miserable.
All right, I was able to move freely wherever I wanted to go. However,
where should I go? No one was there! No one? Nevertheless, there were
voices very far away! In fact, I heard two voices. I could hear them
say, in complete disbelief, something like that:
”Look, look,
there is a little soul! Look there is a young soul! What is he
doing here? How did he come here?”
Voices in this world were actually no voices at all. Something was thought
and I immediately understood what they were talking about. What I am
reporting now are impressions and not the meaning of actual words.
These impressions were, however, so clear that I had no doubts
whatsoever.
I continued complaining that I would not know anyone in this bright world
and that I had been forced to come there. The voices drew nearer.
However, I could not see anybody. I simply sensed their presence, which
was very fine with me. I now knew that there were beings in that world
with whom I was able to communicate. Beings, however, that were
simultaneously strangers, but friendly ones.
The beings urged me to go back where I had come from. I thought this very
ridiculous being now a part of this new world. Moreover, even if I
really wanted to go back, which was impossible, how should I proceed?
In addition, even if I did succeed in finding my way back, I would not
have the slightest idea where my native world, Earth, lay. Then I sensed
that they wanted to force me out of this world. I became very upset and
I thought:
“No one can
force me to leave this world. I have a right to stay here, because I am
a part of it.”
The two beings must have understood what I was thinking, because I could
not sense their voices any longer. Then, one of the beings guided me
(I do not know how) to a place that I had not seen before. The
other one must have gone away calling for assistance in attempting to
find the right approach of how a situation like that should be handled.
This place turned out to be a meadow with many flowers in it. It was a
wonderful meadow, but I knew that it was only an image of a meadow,
somehow conjured up and suspended in this new world. The being asked me
to play on the meadow, but I could not. I simply did not know how.
All of a sudden, I was aware of a tiny bright light far away in the "sky"
but rapidly coming nearer and nearer. It was shaped like a ball and it
was indescribably bright. I tried to shade my eyes, but I did not need
to. Despite its incredible brightness and brilliance, it did not dazzle
me a bit!
Presently, this light stopped at a distance right above me. It was a sun
about the same size as the sun of our world, but it was indescribably
brighter. I kept staring at this sun wondering how a light could possess
such brilliance.
(The brightness of the lights in the black world was brilliant, too,
but of a different nature).
Suddenly I realized that it was scrutinizing me very closely. On that, it
opened up, and a beam came pouring down on me, and I heard it shouting
at me:
"I can
destroy you if you do not tell the truth about your being here!"
I answered:
"But I do not know anything else but the truth!"
Then something happened that I would never, never forget. Love, pure,
utter love came pouring down on me along with incredible warmth. My
whole soul or being was immersed in this love. He lifted me up and gave
me a kiss on my mouth. This Being of Light loved me deeply, infinitely
deeply, and more and more intensively. I was happy! I could have stayed
in this beam of love forever. If my story had been a lie, the Being of
Light would have annihilated me. I had a clear conscience anyway, so
there was no reason to fear anything.
Gradually the loving became weaker and I felt that something was wrong
with me - something that made it very difficult for the light to
continue with his love. He was trying not to tell me why. Finally,
however, he was not able to keep it up any longer and he quickly said:
"You have a
smelly breath. You need a bath."
[Webmaster
note: I believe this is a reference to the
purification process that some souls go through. The phrase "smelly
breath" may be a reference to "smelly thoughts" or negative thoughts
which are incompatible with existence in the higher afterlife realms.
Such thoughts have also been described in other NDEs as a form of
"thought bacteria." Various NDEs demonstrate that such thought processes
must be purified before entering these higher realms.]
I received the impression that I would have to take a bath similar to that
I was used to on Earth, but by dipping the whole body. It was made plain
to me that this process was going to be unpleasant, but I could stop it
when it became too painful for me to bear.
Although I could not comprehend the reason, I was willing to do what the
Being of Light wanted me to do. I was lifted up and put into a red
light. I closed my eyes. I could not feel anything. I did not know for
how long I had been in this state. After some time, however, I realized
that I was being tossed about rather rigorously. It was like being in a
washing machine. I cried:
"I think that
is enough!"
Immediately, I was lowered down and the love and the warmth were switched
off, but I still remained in this beam
(or sphere).
Suddenly the sun disappeared and I saw a moon. I was in a different world.
Everything was black but the moon, which was right in front of me. It
was much clearer and more refulgent than the moon in our world. There
was not a trace of blackness in it. The moon was surrounded by a wreath
of little, bright stars. I kept staring at this shiny moon when suddenly
I felt a strange sensation entering through my left eye and spreading
into the deepest recesses of my brain.
I was
wondering about the fact that I could distinctly see the moon with my
left eye that had always been weaker than my right one and I suddenly
realized that right in front of me were all the answers to any questions
we might have on Earth. I got very excited about this and I tried to
locate the place about which I wanted to tell our scientists on Earth
that they should come and see this extraordinary place.
I tried to pinpoint this place by looking at the left side of the moon and
counting the little bright stars. However, in doing so I realized that
they were not stars but in turn little moons.
Again, I was looking at the left side of the moon and the more I was
looking the more little moons were coming up in a straight line, one
little moon after the other. There was no hope of locating this place.
Then I began to feel cold and I was shivering. I remembered the sun of
our world, its warmth that sometimes may have been too hot but, overall,
it was life-giving warmth. I desperately wanted to return to the bright,
living sun. Only then did I realize that I was looking at the moon with
my left eye while my right eye was closed. I wanted to open my right eye
to see the sun again but I was not able to.
I wanted to leave the moon, which I was no longer interested in. I wanted
to go back to the bright, living sun. I tried very hard but in vain, I
even felt an extremely unpleasant pain in my head. All of a sudden,
however, the moon with its black surroundings disappeared and I saw this
incredible bright sun again.
Suddenly the sun started to move backwards changing its colors to a deep
dark red. It kept moving back into the sky until it was a very tiny red
light - like a point. Then it began to move very quickly. At one time I
saw the bright sun on the left side and then the red sun on the right
side, dancing, as it were, from left to right and from right to left.
I felt that the sun wanted to communicate with me. I thought to myself
that up here the suns cannot speak but just move about and that this was
their way of talking.
Then it stood still and I saw the bright sun in front of the tiny red sun.
Nevertheless, I could not make out what this was all about. I regarded
the whole spectacle more as a funny and entertaining act than anything
else. However, it was not funny at all. I suddenly felt that I should be
transferred back into the world with the shiny moon and I remembered the
unpleasant pain and the cold that I had encountered there.
Suddenly I realized that the bright sun in front of me was the shiny moon
and that the red sun had the moon safely under control making in fact
one sun. This was the message that the sun had wanted to get across.
Then the Being of Light wanted to talk to me on a man-to-man basis. He
placed me on top of a high mountain where I had to sit on a large piece
of rock.
I asked him why he had wanted to destroy me, and he told me that there
existed also evil but very powerful and cunning beings who were his
enemies with whom he had been constantly fighting. He also told me that
I had to warn my world against them, and I automatically nodded in
agreement. He said that his enemies had wanted to play a trick on him by
using me as a kind of trap, but he had to defend this world and the
black one. His world, however, would be much easier for him to defend,
because the evil beings had no power in it and he had no power in the
black world.
I realized having been positioned in such a way that I was able to
overlook a huge stretch of clouds that were marvelously illuminated from
below. Suddenly a flash of lightning whose intense light was much
greater than that of the bright world, forced me to look up. Then a big
bang followed, but I was totally unperturbed. On the horizon, I saw
smoke bulging out of the clouds and gradually taking on the shape of a
mushroom. It grew larger and larger and brighter and brighter. I was in
complete awe. Suddenly everything was gone. I heard the light call:
"Look here!"
I turned
around, and I heard screams and I saw fire and smoke almost surrounding
me. I did not comprehend what this was all about, when suddenly
the light cried:
"I will do
everything in my power to prevent this from happening!"
Then
everything was over. Again, the bright light wanted to talk about his
enemies. However, I was still very impressed with what had
just happened. So I thought to myself:
"Oh no, not
again!"
However, the light made me aware of the fact that this war had been going
on for a very long time, and the evil beings had become more and more
powerful, and if this continued he would not see any means of
preventing them from taking over everything. He said that if the enemy
had really succeeded in coming into his world, the war would have been
lost. He would have been powerful enough, no doubt, to fight them off,
but the war would have been lost in the long run. He was really afraid
of loosing this war. Then it was intimated to me that he needed help. I
wanted to help him, and I replied:
"Yes, but
how?"
He answered
that the only way I could help him was by going back and telling my
world what had happened to me. I was completely shocked to hear him say
so, because I did not want to go back. I was so depressed that I almost
started to cry. All of a sudden he asked:
”Would you
like to know what will become of you later on in your life?”
I looked up
and answered cheerfully:
“Yes, I would love to."
The light said:
"You will become a teacher."
To a certain
extent I was disappointed and repeated:
"A teacher?“
The light replied:
"Imagine a teacher in your world and show me what it is like being one."
I imagined, quite vividly, a teacher who was standing in front of his
pupils giving lessons. The light said:
“No, not that kind of teacher."
I was then
thinking of a university professor lecturing to his students. The light
said: "Not that
kind of teacher. You are going to teach the university teachers!"
I was surprised and almost could not believe it. Besides, I considered
this quite difficult. I imagined a map of my world, and I saw myself in
future life going from place to place, from university to university
teaching the university teachers of my world. But the light said:
"No, not like that. They will come to you!"
I replied:
"To my house?"
The light said:
"Yes, imagine such a situation."
I imagined
our house on Earth, our living room, and I saw myself sitting on a
chair opposite a stern-looking, respectable professor, trying to teach
him. However, I failed. I was too embarrassed and too shy. I said:
"I do not think I am clever enough to do this. Moreover, I have a speech
impediment."
The light replied:
"You will become a new type of teacher and I am going to explain it to
you in a moment."
He then paused, and I looked up and saw myself lying on a hospital bed
that was being pushed down a very long corridor by a member of the
medical staff. I asked, slightly alarmed:
”Am I being ill?"
The light replied:
"No! Just a little bit confused. You will be taken to hospital where you
will get a shot and fall into a very deep sleep."
I was not
worried any more, and the light said:
"But let me explain this new type of teacher. You are going to teach
while being in a sort of sleep. However, it will not be the kind of
sleep that you know of. While being asleep, you will be able to hear and
talk, and they will come to you and ask you questions."
I was deeply impressed, but also worried. So I asked:
"Will I feel pain in this process?"
The light replied:
"No, it will not hurt you."
I gradually became accustomed to the idea of becoming a teacher. So I
asked: "Will
they also learn their lessons?"
He made a
suggestive face, meaning that he was not sure about that. I asked him
another question:
"Will I also
teach them when I am awake?"
The light replied:
"No, you will certainly speak to them when you are awake. But what you
say while being asleep will be of much more importance."
And he showed me a room in which I saw myself sitting on a chair talking
to someone. I actually did not see myself neither did I see the person
to whom I was speaking. Nevertheless, I definitely knew that it was
I, because I was now in that room looking about. I saw a low table,
books on the walls, two windows, and drapes that were moving in front of
a window by a slight draught of wind. Suddenly the room disappeared and
the light said:
"Before doing
this, you will have to write down everything that has happened to you.
Every detail of it. You will have to make a scientific report."
I said: "Of
course."
The light said:
"But I am afraid you will have forgotten everything."
I shook my
head in disbelief. But he said:
"You cannot even tell me now how you came here."
I could not
belief him and tried to remember what had happened on Earth. However, to
my great surprise, I was not able to do so. The light said:
"Do not
worry. A book will help you. In fact, there will be two books, but the
first one will be more important. Besides, you will have many books."
Suddenly the light became quite enthusiastic and said that I was to be the
first teacher of this new type, and there would be a lot more to come. I
was disappointed to hear him say so. Nevertheless, the light wanted
to show what it meant being the first. He asked:
"What do you
think? How many people are there in your world?”
I said:
"40 millions may be?"
The light replied:
"No, many
more. You must not only think of those who are alive. Take into account
all the human beings that are dead and you will have a huge number of
people. Let us go back in time, as far back as possible, and tell me how
far back we should go."
I said:
"Middle Ages?"
The light replied:
"No, farther back."
I said:
"The birth of Christ?"
The light said:
"No, farther back."
I was
thinking hard:
"Adam and Eve?"
The light replied:
"No, not that. Go farther back in time and think of what you have
learned in your history lessons."
I was thinking for some time. Eventually I blurted out:
"Stone Age?"
He was disappointed, and he said: "You
should have known better, but I think Stone Age will do."
He then told me that in that age there were not many people living on
Earth. However, they were free to walk wherever they wanted to go, and
that there were no borders that would keep them from roaming about. I
said: "How
beautiful."
I was
imagining a map of Europe, which I had seen in my Atlas, with all its
borders. I did not have much time to think about all this, because, all
of a sudden, I saw human beings back on Earth.
I was looking down on a group of people, men and women, who were dressed
in furs, sitting around a campfire. I could see a woman with her baby on
her back, and a man who was standing in front of the group obviously
making a speech. Another man stood a little apart.
All of a
sudden, I heard a loud cry of disappointment, and the guttural voice of
the man in front of the group of people. I did not understand what
he was saying. The scene disappeared and the light said:
"I am going
to translate for you, but you must concentrate very hard."
I certainly
wanted to do so, because I was eager to hear what this man was
talking about. Therefore, I started to concentrate. The light said:
"You call
this concentration? You have to concentrate much harder!"
I was amazed to hear him say so, because I considered my first attempt
quite satisfactory. Nevertheless, he wanted me to do better. The light
said:
"Let's have
another go!"
I closed my
eyes and began concentrating extremely hard. However, the light was not
in the least satisfied. He said:
"I think it
is useless."
However, suddenly the tone of his voice became very gentle and he came
close to me and said tenderly:
"The reason
for my asking you to concentrate so hard is that, later on, you should
be able to tell everything as accurately as possible. So you need to
concentrate like you have never done before on what this man is going to
say."
And he added in a different voice that betrayed his disappointment:
"This is a
final attempt. If you fail this time, it will be no use trying any
longer!"
I was
determined to do my best. I closed my eyes again and tried as hard as I
could to listen to what I was supposed to hear. All of a sudden, I was
able to understand what the man was saying. He said:
"Now we have
proof. You have just heard for yourselves. What we have been suspecting
is true. He who took on the difficult task of making such a dangerous
journey has just returned and confirmed our suspicion. They want to
resist us. However, we will not put up with that. I have told you again
and again. Now the time has come to fight them. We must not wait until
they have become stronger. They are still weak now. It is true.
Nevertheless, think of the future! We will have to attack them now."
He was addressing the group of people in a very impressive manner. I was
completely impressed and I could understand very well why he was forced
to attack his enemies. But suddenly I heard this other man, who
was standing apart, say:
"I am
primarily a hunter and fight the animals. I am not going to fight
weaklings who start running away the very moment they catch sight of us.
Every hunter would hurt his pride and honor if he did such a thing. We
hunters fight the animals, which are by far more dangerous. Many brave
hunters have hurt themselves in their fights. Nevertheless, we are
prepared and willing to take the risk because we are hunters. I will
never fight those weaklings."
As for me, I could not get along with what he was saying. After all, one
had to fight one's enemies. I could not understand that it should be
more honorable to fight animals than people. However, I could not go on
contemplating such things, because my eyes were forced to the ground
that gradually began to move. At first slowly, but then faster and
faster until I was no longer able to distinguish any details.
The movement
suddenly came to a halt. I saw grassland in front of me and in the
distance there was the edge of a forest with very high trees. Suddenly,
I was placed in the woods. Although I could not see anything, I knew
that I was in this forest, that is, right in the middle of a village. I
could hear the voices of some people and I heard someone say:
"We cannot
run away forever. How many times did we have to run away? Many, many
times! Such beasts! They come and destroy our village! And every time we
run away. But not this time! This time we are going to stay! It cannot
go on like that forever."
I could feel fear and anxiety. They would have liked to run away as they
had done so many times before. However, this time they had made up their
minds and intended to stick to their firm resolve. However, they were
all full of fear. Some voices said:
"They eat
meat! Imagine that! Meat! In addition, they build huge fires in the
prairie. They dance around the fires and bathe in blood. However, what
remains the worst: They eat meat. The very thought of it! In the end,
they are going to eat our flesh, too."
A voice, a woman's voice, who was sitting in her hut, kept saying again
and again: "I
am afraid. I am terribly afraid. Oh, how scared I am! I am scared, so
scared."
I was able to feel distinctly her anxiety. Her fear grew stronger and
stronger. She kept saying:
"I am scared, I am scared."
Her fear
began to take hold of me. At first I thought: “Why
is she so afraid? She must be hysterical. How on earth can you be so
afraid?!"
Nevertheless, I was being immersed, deeper and deeper, into her feelings
of sheer fear. I could not stand it any longer! I thought to myself:
”I wish she stopped worrying now.”
It was
extremely unpleasant indeed. Suddenly everything was over, and the light
said to me:
"If they had
done nothing, nothing would have happened. It is true; they would have
come all the same. However, nothing would have happened. This, however,
will again lead to further dead persons!"
He was
stressing the words - dead persons - and - again. I felt great
apprehension on the part of the light concerning the large number of
dead people, so I asked, "Again?" because I was of the opinion that I
had watched the first human beings on Earth. The light
answered, however:
"Hundreds of
thousands."
I was amazed
at this and I could feel how the light was suffering from the great
number of dead people.
I am not quite sure about what happened next, but all of a sudden, I heard
a thunderous, angry voice accusing mankind, including myself, of
destroying his garden on Earth. He shouted:
”I made you
human beings a wonderful garden and you destroy everything. Human beings
poison the water and the air. They destroy everything. At first, the
effect of their work of destruction was limited. However, it got worse
and worse. They destroy everything that they can lay their hands on.
Although Man is constantly looking for other places, he has only this
one place
(Earth). You could see for yourself. And if they continue to
destroy everything they will blow up the whole Earth in the end!”
I was completely perplexed. After some time, the light said:
”Ask me that you
do not know how to inform your world.”
I answered:
”But you have just told me how to do it!”
However, he
insisted by saying:
"Now you are again a little and ignorant child that does not know how to
do it!”
So I asked him that, being a little and ignorant child, I would not know
how to inform my world. To my great surprise, the light answered in an
angry and brusque voice:
”You will
know how to do it when the time is right.”
However, I did not want to leave him forever. So I asked him if I could
come back after having told my world and stay with him permanently. He
said:
”No, you have
to go back and live.”
Although I still did not know my way back, this time I had no doubts
whatsoever. If the Being of Light wanted me to go back and live, I
simply had to. It did not matter any longer how it could be done. This
light had absolute power. Nevertheless, I could still not understand
why. I repeatedly pleaded:
”Why? Why can
I not come back? Why? Why? Why? Why am I not allowed staying on in your
very love and warmth?”
The light answered that no one could stay permanently with him. However, I
still was not satisfied. If it was not possible to stay with him, I
surely could come back and stay in this bright world in which those two
beings were already living! But the light repeated:
”No, you have to
go back and live!”
I replied:
“But why have these two beings been allowed to stay?”
The light
answered that even these two beings could not stay on permanently. They
were only in this world in order to learn. In addition, he began
to emphasize the importance of love and learning. He wanted me to be his
apprentice. He the master, I the apprentice. However, I still could not
see what love and learning should have to do with my wish to stay on
in this bright world.
I had, it was true, to admit that I did not love the light, but I
certainly was willing to learn everything that he wanted me to learn.
On that, the light started, to my great dismay, to position himself
further back in the sky, and I could not feel his presence any longer,
because the beam had been switched off. I suddenly felt cold and very
miserable.
However, one of the other beings asked me to watch a certain place very
carefully. Indeed, they urgently asked me not to move but to fix my eyes
on to that place. I did what I had been told to and presently I saw
this panoramic review. Very vividly and distinctly. I was stupefied! The
images of this film moved very rapidly, showing me my past life on
Earth. I could instantly understand everything that was being shown to
me.
(I cannot
remember any of the details, because this was only an experiment to test
my ability whether I was able to really understand what I was watching.)
The beings asked me several times if I could clearly comprehend what was
being shown. I answered impatiently: ”Of
course, of course!”
I was
slightly annoyed about their questions.
(In communicating with the beings, I always used my mouth as I had done on
Earth. This was not the case when I was talking with the Being of Light)
Thereupon the Being of Light started to show me my past life again, but
this time the stress lay on the quality of my soul during my existence
on Earth. When I was watching my past life the first time, I was just
very happy to be able to watch my former world and myself. I regarded
this actually more as an entertainment than anything else. I did not
feel miserable any longer.
However, the second time, former events of my life on Earth were shown
with the emphasis on my reaction to certain situations in terms of love
or nastiness or even hatred. This was made quite clear to me, and I knew
what to look during the second review. Everything started from the
beginning. I could not see how I came into existence on Earth, because I
only had to mind my behavior with regard to love or hatred.
At first I was very satisfied that nothing was happening to which I could
have reacted with either love or hatred. Then, the film speeded up, but
there still was not anything for which I could have been made
responsible. I was stupid enough to say triumphantly: ”See,
there is nothing!”
On that, I
could see a scene in which my twin sister and I were quarrelling
(I could not make out the reason for the argument), but I
instantly knew how ugly I had behaved. I said to the light:
”But you must
understand! This is bad, all right, but this is the way human
beings behave on Earth! You cannot really blame me for that!”
The great
light did not blame me for anything that I had done on Earth.
Then I was shown some more nasty scenes on Earth in which I had behaved
badly. However, I still had excuses. Then, I think the great light
became slightly impatient at my stupidity, no doubt.
Suddenly, the
film was accelerated to such an extent that I was unable to distinguish
any images at all. Then it stopped abruptly, and I was confronted with a
situation in which I behaved extremely badly.
My behavior was tremendously enhanced, so that every bad aspect of my
character stood out clearly in front of me. It was horrifying! I could
hardly believe this character of mine! I was finally convinced! Such a
soul could never stay on in this bright world! I had no right, no claim
whatsoever! I was completely shaken and dejected. I wanted to go back.
Yes, there was really no other way possible. Then I saw the light
disappear into the “Sky”, and I heard a laughter and the words:
”And he really thought he could stay on!”
Then the
Being of Light was gone. One of the other beings brought me back to
Earth. I do not know how. I only heard, while being tucked back into my
body, a snapping sound like the sound that can be heard when you put the
lid on top of a mess tin securing it with the catch. When I opened my
eyes, I remember starting to cry:
”I do not want to die, I do not want to die, and I do not want to die!”
Then I picked myself up and in approaching the staircase, I wondered if
there would ever be a way back, whereupon I heard a voice shout at me:
”Amend
yourself!”
And another
voice said:
”You must kill
your mother!”
[Webmaster
note: This voice is obviously from a mischievous soul in the void.]
Then I
climbed up the stairs down which I had been jumping so happily. I
could only feel a minor swelling on the top of my head, which was
not particularly painful."
[Guenter Wagner's NDE
account ends here.]
More
about Guenter Wagner
I am German, male, unmarried, born 1942. Immediately after my experience, I
was very troubled and I couldn't understand what had happened to me. I
simply did not know what to do next. I couldn't talk to anybody about it.
I wanted to obey the Being of Light by writing a scientific report, but I
was unable to do so. I simply did not know how to proceed. Then suddenly a
voice told me that I had to learn another language. Period.
At night, I felt very miserable. This went on for about 2 weeks, when, one
night, the Being of Light returned and said that I had to forget everything.
Later in my life, however, I would encounter great misery.
Relieved, I turned myself on the other side and fell asleep. When I woke up
the following morning, I couldn't recall a single word!!
For the following 25 years, I had lived my life the way I wanted it to live.
I became an alcoholic and resigned from church. I believed neither in God
nor in the other world. However, I did develop a drive for learning English.
The big change, though, came in 1980, shortly before Christmas Eve. On TV,
there was a report on NDEs, and they were talking about a light. Suddenly it
struck me that I, too, had once seen such a light. Thank God, I could not
recall everything at once. Surely, it would have killed me!
I personally call this my Saul/Paul experience, because it had a similar
effect on me. Saul had been blind for 3 days and became an apostle later on
and I became a fighter against the devil in and about me.
The positive effect of all this was, however, that I instantly got rid of my
alcohol problem. The negative effects were three suicide attempts in 1981.
(The third one almost being successful).
As an after-effect of alcoholism, I developed a rupture of my stomach in
1986 whereby I missed the grave only by an inch. They took out my entire
stomach plus other organs. By the way, no cancer. The Being of Light was
right, after all.
In 1980/81 I couldn't write down my experience in German, and even today
there is no German translation, because I have not yet had the inner O.K.
from the Being of Light who is our Lord Jesus Christ.
Besides, it is more difficult for me to translate my story into German,
because the recollection of the experience was entirely in English, and I
have trouble finding the correct German terms
(I have never been good at translating anyway.)"
Frequently Asked Questions
Guenter is
interviewed by someone who is interested in near-death experiences.
Question: You were about
11 years at the time. Age and worldview have an influence on the NDE
experienced by individuals. Do you think the Being of Light treated you as a
child?
Wagner: No, I don't. He specifically wanted to talk to
me on a man-to-man basis. At the end of my report he said and I quote. After
some time, the light said:
”Ask me that you do not know how to inform your world.”
I answered:
”But you have just
told me how to do it!”
However, he
insisted by saying:
”Now you are again a little and ignorant child that does not know how to do
it!”
So I asked him
that, being a little and ignorant child, I would not know how to inform my
world.
Question: Such a
judgmental light, all the emphasis on fighting, being told to kill your
mother. How do you feel about this?
Wagner: Strangely enough, there was not only a voice at
the end of the experience, but right at the beginning as well.
There are not only good guys in the spiritual world. The Bible calls them
demons, devil, evil beings, serpent, dragon etc. and on earth we are
constantly surrounded by them – sometimes people get obsessed by them.
I have been fighting those evil spirits since 1980 and this will continue
until I die that is until I leave my body forever.
For instance, the evil voices told me more than once that hey were going to
kill me. They hate Jesus Christ and every person who chooses Him. I can
testify to this.
Right after my NDE/OBE, however, I had no idea whatsoever as to whom that
voice was or where it came from.
Question: How do I
feel about this?
Wagner:
Well, in spite of all that has happened, I would not like to miss one single
event of my live.
Since Christmas 1980, I have been able to establish a personal relationship
with the Being of Light by way of internal fights, visions and auditions and
I am now in a position to go public with my experience.
Question: Did you
like your mother?
Wagner: Yes, I did.
I did not kill her. She died peacefully at the age of 92 in 1994."
Question:
There are both hellish and heavenly aspects to it - both the good and the
bad. How do you explain the loving parts and the not-so-loving parts, the
way you were treated, what you were told? I am also curious to know about
afterward.
Wagner:
Since 1980 I have undergone many temptations and have thus learned more than
during my entire stay in the other world. You could also say that through
temptations I have drawn the Lord God Jesus Christ into existence on earth.
Please don't get me wrong here.
The loving parts come exclusively from our Lord Jesus Christ, who is God.
The term God includes infinity, eternity, omnipotence, omnipresence,
omniscience etc. However, no one knows what those words actually mean. That
is why the most ancient Jews did not name God.
But this is not so with the name Jesus Christ. He is God in form, a visible
God, a real person in whom the fullness of the Godhead dwells
(according to Paul). Jesus Christ is plainly man and all other human
beings are made in His image.
(He being the original, we are the copies, so to speak). His father
is Divine Love itself and He is Divine Wisdom itself and His will is the
Holy Ghost. These three make one God in Jesus Christ.
In 1996, He made me aware of what it really means when you say you have
prayed to God, namely nothing. A very unpleasant experience indeed, actually
one of the worst experiences I have ever had in this respect. (Horrible,
terrifying, harrowing).
The not-so-loving parts stem from malicious, evil spirits. I do not know
whether you have ever experienced their malice and their slanderous
behavior. Their hatred is indescribable.
They were once physical human beings. However, they did and still do love
evil and without love no one can exist. Our Lord God Jesus Christ has the
power to destroy them, no doubt, but He will not do so, because of their
free will and their love. Love is what constitutes man
(either way).
The Being of Light (our Lord Jesus Christ) is my master and I am His
apprentice, as He told me so in my NDE/OBE. Actually, it is not me who
fights these evil beings; it is He who does so. He told me so in
His “lecture” on the importance of love and learning. I said in my report,
and I quote:
“In addition,
he began to emphasize the importance of love and learning.”
In this sentence alone is hidden more than words can tell and so it is with
the entire account. In January 1987, for example, He taught me:
"I am nothing. I can do
nothing. I have nothing. I am dead. I am what I am through the Lord Jesus
Christ. I can do what I can do through the Lord Jesus Christ. I have what I
have through the Lord Jesus Christ. I am alive."
In April last year He came to me in person (although I did not see him)
and set my whole heart and chest on fire. However, this is another
story. And so on and so on.
Question: What was
it like for you after the accident?
Wagner: Please refer to the above.
Question: You were
only 11 years old. Was your body different in any way? Were your abilities
and perceptions different in any way? How did you feel inside? How was
school for you afterwards? Did you feel any different in your family?
Wagner: I had forgotten my NDE and I led a normal life.
No special feelings, occurrences etc whatsoever.
Question: With your
twin sister?
Wagner: She knows nothing about it. No one in my family
knows about my experience; let alone my colleagues.
Question: You must
have been caught up in the war years and what happened to Germany and with
the Nazis.
Wagner: No, I have not. I was born in 1942, the war
ended in 1945. I had a happy childhood. We didn't have much to eat, though,
but we never starved. My hometown was not subject to enemy attacks and
remained intact.
Question: Did your
experience at the age of 11 make any difference in what you saw, how you
felt, about what was going on around you?
Wagner: No, it did not. I simply didn't understand what
had happened to me and I kept thinking about it.
Question: Do you
suppose that your experience presaged (prepared you for) the war?
Wagner: No, I do not. I was a baby at that time.
Question: Do you
suppose the Being of Light was so mean and spoke so much of fighting because
that is what your world was filled with at that time?
Wagner: No, I do not. Besides, our world is still filled
with fighting.
(The Being of Light is never mean, ever.)
Question: Did your
experience prepare you for the war and the after-effects of the war, how it
would affect you as a youngster, and what you would have to go through?
Wagner: No, it did not. I forgot everything.
Question: I do
believe you had a near-death experience, not just an out-of-body experience.
Wagner: So do I.
Question:
I have found that with the majority of child experiencers of near-death
states, it takes about 20 to 30 years, even 40 years, before they are able
to understand what happened to them and integrate their experience.
Wagner: That is most certainly true.
Question: Many turn
to alcohol within about 5 to 8 years of their experience.
Wagner:
You are right on, indeed. I turned to alcohol when I was about 20 years old.
By the way, I had three OBEs altogether; the first one during birth, the
second one when I was about four, the third one at the age of 11 or 12.
In 1980/81, while recollecting my experience, I recalled those two other
experiences, as well, which made things worse at the time.
Question: I suspect
there is more to your story.
Wagner:
You are certainly right here.
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